A blog by Luke Akehurst about politics, elections, and the Labour Party - With subtitles for the Hard of Left. Just for the record: all the views expressed here are entirely personal and do not necessarily represent the positions of any organisations I am a member of.

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Consensus Politics - the Australian Rules version

Political dialogue on Hackney Council can sometimes get a bit heated, but pales into nothing compared to the insults flung about in Australian politics.

Here are some of the best, courtesy of www.news.com.au:

Former Labor Prime Minister Paul Keating:
On John Howard:
“What we have got is a dead carcass, swinging in the breeze, but nobody will cut it down to replace him.”
“...the brain-damaged Leader of the Opposition...”
“But I will never get to the stage of wanting to lead the nation standing in front of the mirror each morning clipping the eyebrows here and clipping the eyebrows there with Janette and the kids: It’s like ‘Spot the eyebrows’.”
And of his 1986 leadership - “From this day onwards, Howard will wear his leadership like a crown of thorns, and in the parliament I’ll do everything to crucify him.”
On Wilson Tuckey:
“Shut up! Sit down and shut up, you pig!”
“You box head you wouldn’t know. You are flat out counting past ten.”
On John Hewson:
“A feral abacus”
“His performance is like being flogged with a warm lettuce”
“The answer is, mate, because I want to do you slowly” - after Hewson asked him why he wouldn’t call an early election
On Andrew Peacock’s prospects of leading the Liberals for a second time:
“A soufflé never rises twice”
Former Labor Leader Mark Latham:
“Hand in your badge, Adolf.” - directed at former immigration minister Philip Ruddock.
“Howard is an arse-licker. He went over there, kissed some bums, and got patted on the head.” - description of Prime Minister John Howard’s trip to the United States.
“There they are a conga line of suck holes on the conservative side of politics.”
“John Howard has forgotten how to be a good Australian, not some yes-man to a flaky and dangerous American president.” - On Coalition support for the war in Iraq.
“He has this sort of habit of thinking that if you comb a couple of strands of hair over the top of your bald head, nobody will notice. And that you know they’ll think that you’ve got a full head of hair.” - On Bob McMullan 19/9/2005 Andrew Denton Show
Treasurer Peter Costello:
“That is enough to put me into a cold sweat. If I look tired it is because I have thought of that in the middle of the night” - Treasurer Peter Costello ponders the thought of a Labor Government
Prime Minister John Howard:
“You tree hugger you.” - Howard’s response to a journalist asking a question about Tasmania’s old growth forests
Union Leader Bill Shorten:
On former Labor Leader Mark Latham:
He ""possesse[d] all the attributes of a dog except loyalty"


Blogger Dave Cole said...

Paul Keating on Malcolm Fraser:

"You look like an Easter Island statue with an arse full of razorblades"

5:17 pm, August 15, 2006

Blogger Luke Young said...

I never knew the aussies could be so wild!

10:39 pm, August 15, 2006

Blogger Welsh Spin said...

"I'm a bastard. But I'm a bastard who gets the mail through."
Paul Keating

4:17 pm, August 16, 2006


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